Saturday, January 05, 2008

What's a FUDD?

A Truism by any other name still rings crystal clear. This one, in particular, shines brightly as it illuminates the creature known as The FUDD. Jim Zumbo figured out really quickly how it pertained to him, and got himself a big serving of humble pie for his troubles. Fellow FUDD David Petzal has yet to be visited by the clue bird, and spouts his particular brand of ignorance to this day, even dodging his own documented history regarding his 1994 endorsement of the original Assault Weapons Ban. One can hope that will be remedied soon, and I have no problems reminding him and his ilk of the color of their stripes in the meantime.

Now, what's the heck's a FUDD?

A FUDD is somebody who has no problem giving you a ration of crap for the inline-ignition muzzleloader that you bought for deer season, while extolling the virtues of his own "primitive" flintlock or caplock. Of course, the primitive concept only goes so far, because chances are he's driving to the deer woods from home vs. riding a horse or walking there on foot. Not only that, but he's probably using Pyrodex vs. real Holy Black. The only thing primitive about these guys and their beloved smokepoles is their Triassic attitudes towards other sportsmen and gun owners in general. You want "primitive", Hero? Jump out of a tree onto the back of the deer, stabbing it with a sharp pointy stick. Then I'll give you props for primitive. Otherwise, STFU.

By way of further explanation, I give you this:

"FUDDs come in many [other] forms, as well. The original idea was indeed from the character of Elmer Fudd, with his cartoon hunting guns.

There's FUDDs who will declare that anything beyond their chosen year is okay to be banned. This varies from the 19th century to the 1960's...that anything beyond blackpowder isn't needed up to anything beyond their 1960's Marlin isn't needed. Whatever they think won't affect them.

There's FUDDs who think all semiauto rifles are killing machines and ought to be banned. They tend to shut up when you ask them if that includes the Garand, which is indeed semiauto and far more "lethal" than 5.56 AR! Surviving a COM hit with a 5.56x45 is possible. Surviving a COM hit with a 30-06 would be incredibly lucky.

There's FUDDS who want anything scary-looking banned...forgetting that their scoped hunting rifle is a SNIPER RIFLE on the nooz.

There are FUDDs who want all military calibers banned, even. As long as it doesn't affect their old thutty-thutty.

And, of course, there's FUDDS who even look down on other guns of their chosen sort. You see, you're supposed to show up at the clay range with a $25,000 engraved shotgun signed by Pietro Beretta himself. If you arrive with your plastic-stocked 870 with a rail on it, well, you must be up to No Good, and that sort ought to be banned, too.

The one constant is that they're all more damaging to gun rights than the antis are. Because they're willing to pretend to be gun-rights sorts, and then they throw everyone under the bus."

There you have it.